TV comedian and regular on the BBC NI show, The Blame Game, shared his thoughts with The Impartial Reporter on a wide range of topics, freewheeling in his inimitable style from topic to topic.
Who do you blame for 'the Brexit border' now being in the Irish Sea as opposed to along the Fermanagh Border?
It's hard to look beyond the current incumbent of No. 10 Downing Street.
If you negotiate a deal, don’t be surprised that the deal you negotiated comes to pass. You did negotiate it after all!
Who do you blame for differing Covid-19 rules in Belcoo and Blacklion?
There are different variants on either side of the dotted line, Belcoovid on one side and Cavan Covid on the other.
Basically, the virus swans around in the air, and if it hears you say ‘Primark’ you get the Belcoo variant, and if you say ‘Penney’s’, you get the other one. It is very sophisticated.
Will Covid-19 ever end?
Eventually, yes. There are only few more letters left in the Greek alphabet to name new variants after. I’m pretty sure when we run out of them, the pandemic is over.
In hindsight, it was a good decision not to name variants after characters in the Chinese alphabet – there are thousands.
Two political figures have left the scene since you last gigged in Enniskillen. Who will you miss joking about more: Arlene Foster or Donald Trump?
Well, Trump – the demented Lucozade bottle – certainly made the headlines every day, but he was so extreme he was almost too easy to joke about.
NI politicians, in the main, make us work a little bit harder. There are a few notable exceptions whose regular outpourings of utter nonsense are grist to the mill.
What hobbies did you pick up during our many, many lockdowns?
I took up the hobby of buying exercise equipment I will never use.
I even bought a wetsuit, which sadly does not make me look like an Australian surfer; more like someone wrapped a bullock in clingfilm. You might as well put Spandexx on a snowman.
Will you be showcasing any of your well-honed TikTok dancing during your shows?
I have yet to enter the world of Tik Tok. This is possibly because my dancing skills are so good, it would intimidate the other users so much that the application would implode.
In truth, I dance like a full back shepherding the ball out of play.
What did you make of the new film, 'Normal People', starring Paul Mescal and Daisy Edgar-Jones, who has a Fermanagh mother?
Would you believe, I haven’t seen much of it. I thought the sketch they did for Comic Relief was brilliant, and now I know that Daisy’s mother is from Fermanagh that explains a few things.
It’s very, very rare for somebody who isn’t Irish to do such a flawless Irish accent, but hers was remarkable.
Which scheme helped the local economy more: Eat Out to Help Out, or the Spend Local cards?
Well, the first seemed to cause a spike in Covid cases, so I’ll go for Spend Local.
Also, only one of them can be used in local theatres to buy tickets for my tour, so it’s Spend Local all the way for me.
How do you relax for Christmas?
I try to get into the spirit of it by inexplicably heading back to the place where my father’s people were born to do a census. I travel by donkey.
When is the correct time to eat Christmas dinner? Should there be a rule?
When it’s cooked.
What is a typical Christmas in the Delamere household?
We get up at dawn, and dance naked around the local dolmen to commune with our ancestors. We don’t cook anything. We usually forage for food in the forest, living off our wits and Yop.
Then we watch 'Ben Hur' twice and go to bed.
Are there any up-and-coming comedians that you enjoy watching?
I haven’t seen that much live stand-up in the past 18 months, for obvious reasons, but Grace Mulvey is an act from Dublin that caught my eye.
She won a BBC bursary award last year for her writing. Definitely one to watch.
What can we expect from your show, Liminal?
I tend to chat about what I’ve been up to for the last year, so this show might be a little different.
Expect fewer travel stories and more about the very specific ins and outs of how to load a dishwasher.
What’s the craic with Schrodinger’s Cat?
The craic with Schrodinger's cat is that it’s both dead and alive really. You’d probably get two rewards for him in the Wild West.
What can audiences expect when you return to Enniskillen next year?
What I like most about the Enniskillen audience is that they’re up for the messing. Every time I do it is different from the last, and after the year we’ve all had, I’m hoping we can all enjoy some light relief together.
Neil Delamere, star of BBC’s The Blame Game, Fighting Talk and the Newsquiz, hits the road again with his riotous new stand-up show, Liminal.
Expect an evening perhaps best described as Schrodinger’s chat as the wisecracking comedic hero struggles to figure out this strange new world.
Neil will perform in The Ardhowen Theatre on February 5 next.
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