Enniskillen mother's call for action on mental health support

She didn’t want to go; she had not left her home unaccompanied for two years prior. However, a persistent bus driver encouraged her to step out of her house, a simple but powerful move in her path to recovery.

The Enniskillen woman, who grew up in the care system near Leeds in England, is now sharing her journey — from wanting to end her life several years ago to speaking at Stormont about the work of Action Mental Health, which played a key part in her recovery.

Yesterday (Wednesday), she addressed politicians while speaking on a panel at Stormont as part of the ‘I am Someone’ campaign. This initiative by the charity aims to put a face to mental health statistics.

Currently, one in five people in Northern Ireland experience mental ill health.

Her motivation for speaking out is simple: she wants to see more done to prevent suicide and help those living with mental health challenges in Fermanagh.

Vicky (40) moved to Fermanagh around 15 years ago. She says she has lived with poor mental health her entire life, stemming from her childhood. She lives with Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Emotional Personality Disorder, and other mental health diagnoses.

She said: “I was brought up in England, in care, with no family or anything. I think I always struggled with my mental health.”

With her hands crossed, her knuckles read "self-made," a reflection of her journey from care to where she is now.

Vicky described in heartbreaking detail her breaking point several years ago when the woman who had cared for her — who was like family — died in her arms.

“I think the realisation of my childhood hit me. I'd never really processed it. I had Dan, my son, at 18 — he's 21 now — so I had him to contend with. He was a distraction, and I hid how poorly I was, normalising it."

Recalling that time, she said: “I was hearing voices and seeing things. It was horrific. I didn’t think there was going to be an end to it, so I decided it would probably be best for everyone if I wasn’t here anymore, and those were very serious plans I’d made.

“I’d got my life insurance set up, paid off the house, and got everything sorted for Dan. I was going to slip away, and I confided in my friend about it. I said goodbye to her, and she put a stop to it and got me help.”

Vicky had spent time in and out of in-patient care at the Tyrone and Fermanagh Hospital and Gransha Park.

“When I was out of in-patient care, I was referred to psychology,” she said.

“I didn’t want to go, but I was in psychology for five years, once a week, and she changed everything. She was really bloody good, and then she referred me to Action Mental Health.

“I just thought, what a load of rubbish. I thought this is not me. I either wanted to be ‘normal’ or die—there was no in-between for me. I didn’t want to be in a day centre."

With a wide smile and a laugh, she said: “I actually bloody loved it!”

The charity became a key part of her routine. Through Action Mental Health New Horizons, she took part in various courses, including pottery, woodwork, computing, and psychology courses focused on dealing with emotions.

One particular joy was pottery, where she not only learned about the craft but also about life: “I lived 100 miles an hour, all or nothing. Fight or flight, always, always, always.

“The pottery teacher there taught me to slow down.”

Vicky also gained camaraderie and a new sense of confidence: “The more I talked about it with people, the more I realised I wasn’t alone."

Her progress was steady, and one day she had a realisation: “After doing all these courses and flying through them for about a year, I realised I didn’t want to die anymore. I hadn’t thought about it for a while,” she said.

Up until her period of mental ill health, Vicky had worked full-time. Following her treatment, she was told she wouldn’t work again, which disappointed her as she loved working.

Instead, she tried volunteering, something she still does to this day: “I went to Castle Coole, and there is a lovely woman called Ann who runs the bookshop there. She took me under her wing. I did New Horizons and the bookshop, and then I was spending more time at the bookshop than at New Horizons. Then they said to me, ‘Shall we do your CV?’”

Vicky explained how she and the team put together a CV and prepared for an interview, which led her to her current job at Iceland, which she adores.

She proudly wore her uniform to this interview and shared several anecdotes about her fellow staff members and the customers she cherishes: “I started on ten hours a week, and I am now full-time and a duty manager. I love working at Iceland. I love meeting the regulars. My store manager and the team are epic,” she said.

Her motivation for joining the campaign with Action Mental Health and speaking to this newspaper as a former service user stems from the charity’s loss of critical funding in 2023 when it lost support from the European Social Fund (ESF) following Brexit.

Some of the people who were key to her journey have since been “let go” from the charity due to the cuts.

Vicky wants action from local politicians: “I want to look them in the eye and ask them why.

“I’ve lost four friends this year to suicide. Why are people losing jobs in the community who were helping others?

“I just want to call upon our MLAs and MP: what are they doing to prevent suicide and help mental health in Fermanagh?” she said.

Continuing, she said: “We’re rural. Omagh gets more. Belfast gets more. Everywhere gets more. What do we get? We get the scraps of services, and it’s not good enough.

“There is a waiting list for everything now, which I understand. I get it. The NHS, it’s knackered. But that’s not my job. I work in Iceland. It’s our politicians’ job.

“It’s their job to go to these places and ask, ‘Right, what do you guys need?’ It’s not millions of pounds they need. It’s just a wee bit of support and community engagement.”

Vicky is an example of why the Action Mental Health New Horizons service is vital for the community, as she urges that anyone might need it: “We all suffer with mental health. Just because I was diagnosed doesn’t mean you don’t have it. Everyone suffers.

“The most stable of people will suffer. One day they might need that service, and it might not be there.”

Reflecting on her journey to this point, she said: “I’m not surviving anymore. I’m living. I spent 35 years surviving traumas that I still can’t talk about from my birth parents and the things they did to us.

“You carry that through life, and you’re angry. But I’m not angry anymore. I’m just so happy to be here.

“I love getting up. I love getting up and going to work, and just everything—I love everything. I’m embracing life now.”

Action Mental Health runs a self-referral scheme, and details can be found on their website: www.amh.org.uk.

If you need urgent help, contact: - Samaritans – 116 123

- Lifeline – 0808 808 8000

- Childline – 0800 1111