Bernadette McAliskey shares her thoughts on election results

The constituency registered 66 per cent of its electorate voting on the day (65.97 per cent, to be exact) which was more than eight per cent above the NI average turnout.

Post-election aftermath always feels – for me, anyway – a bit like the day after Boxing Day (or St. Stephen’s Day, if you prefer).

Representative Democracy views the citizen contribution to the electoral process as turning up on the day and voting.

The rest of the activity is preamble and propaganda from commentators and candidates to persuade us to do just that, in much in the same way that the purpose of modern-day Christmas (for those also trying to sell us things we may not want) is to ensure that we give them our money.

No matter the level of engagement in the whole (or holy) show, once the curtain comes down and the immediate clearing up is done, the overwhelming desire is to sit quietly somewhere undisturbed by the cacophony of the experience.

For those not familiar with that word in everyday speak, it is the polite or gentrified description of din, clatter, racket, commotion, hurly burly, hullaballoo, or as the poet, John Keats put it, ‘uproar rude’.

It sounds about right, but the German language has a much more expressive word – katzenjammer!

Literally translated, it means the noise made by a very distressed cat! You get the picture!

In the days and weeks that follow both aforementioned rituals, minds turn to further celebration, post-mortems, regrets, rationalising, revising the spin, and counting the cost and benefit.

All result in resolutions to do better, be wiser and get preparations under way much earlier the next time.

This might be the time to alert you that we are over half-way to next Christmas! No matter!

Congratulations to all winners, and commiserations to all losers. Regardless of political affiliations, it isn’t easy fighting elections, never mind losing them.

As one stalwart young woman remarked in 1974 as we left ‘the count’ in Omagh, and she headed for home in the late hours: “It’s a long way to Portglenone an’ you bate!”

*****

Some of the unintentionally funniest comments of the elections included Tim Collins, who attributed his defeat to the good burghers of North Down being only interested in ‘potholes and hedges’.

He would know all about it if he had contested Mid Ulster, where our local councillors vie daily to be the first to spot a new or emerging pothole or a hedge, or grass that needs mowing, and alert us via social media that they have alerted the appropriate authorities. Potholes clearly matter.

The joint winners of the ‘I Can’t Believe What Just Happened’ camera shot have to be Sorcha Eastwood MP, who surprised both herself and me by not being narrowly defeated, and Ian Paisley Junior, ex-MP, who was even more shocked at losing than Jim Allister was at winning!

The prize for the most elusive candidate must go to John Kelly, Independent candidate in Mid Ulster.

Neither I, nor anyone of whom I enquired, received any election literature from him.

Intrigued, I sought information from the list of candidates duly nominated.

Those who knew him well enough to nominate him seemed to hail from Draperstown, better known as Ballnascreen to some of us.

Several potential John Kellys were discounted and he remained no more than a name on a list without a hint of his politics being unearthed.

Mr. Kelly secured 181 votes. He missed the opportunity to perhaps have added one more to his tally.

As it was, I voted for Gaza, as I promised, adding to the Mid Ulster ‘spoiled’ vote tally of 246.

Almost 40 per cent of the Mid Ulster electorate failed to show up on the day.

We’ll never know if their absence was due to caring too much about something, or not caring at all. 

Hats off to Gerry Cullen who made it possible for 624 different voices in Fermanagh-South Tyrone to be heard, and to the 181people in Mid Ulster who figured out what John Kelly stood for and agreed with it.

You don’t have to agree with what someone says in order to defend their right to be heard.

It is ironic that Northern Ireland, which makes the most noise about being in or out of the UK, is the devolved area with the lowest level of voting in the UK Parliamentary elections.

Those really not wanting to be in the United Kingdom at all are accounted, at a minimum, by the combined Sinn Féin/SDLP or Independent Republican vote.

Likewise, those wanting to remain by the combined DUP, UUP, TUV and Independent Unionist tally, and those for whom the issue is a secondary consideration by Alliance and the small Left parties.

Can we assume that the remaining 43 per cent of citizens who have registered to vote, and those who haven’t even done that bit, will be happy enough with whatever way the wind blows on the constitutional question and the future of the whole island? I doubt that!

I blame the Katzenjammer and a loss of hope that taking part will change anything except the name of the party with the most power.

 Not so! See what France could do to save the day.

*****

‘The Glorious Twelfth’ is upon us. Nothing marks the core faultline in our society more than the commemoration of the Battle of the Boyne in 1690.

The Orange Order will host the banners of the Dutch King William aloft, disregarding the historical reality that the Pope blessed and the Vatican financially supported this war with the Scottish King.

King William’s was the Papist side to put manners on the French Monarchy. Should you not be carrying the Papal flag as well?

If the battle had been had fought along the French or English coast, or in the lowlands of Holland, where you all would be marching? Eh?

On the other side of the coin, the Irish Republican (as opposed to the Hibernian Nationalist) movement was led by Northern Presbyterians.

Where else would you get it? We can all agree on hoping it doesn’t rain over the holiday weekend. Stay safe and be kind.